Category Archives: Of This and That

Desert Storm Memory……

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I was guest speaker at one of the local Woman’s Clubs yesterday with my presentation of, “Inadvertent Pioneer”. This was in honor of Veterans Day. That presentation is focused on the transition time of 1974 thru 1995 when significant changes took place for women and I happened to be part of it through a series of circumstances.

Anyway, this presentation always stirs memories of different parts of my career. As I’ve posted before, my husband and I were with Second Corps Support Command (2d COSCOM) under the VII Corps for Desert Shield and Desert Storm. He was moved to the newly established Task Force Bennett and I stayed with the COSCOM Headquarters. In practical terms that meant he was further forward in the desert than I was and we did see each other briefly occasionally when our duties overlapped. During the main part of our deployment, we did have some trailers as office space at the headquarters (we did move three times I think it was before we folded into King Khalid Military City after Hussein surrendered). Most of the headquarters was in tents; the large ones for mess hall, operations, etc.,  – smaller ones for living. One of the things we had to get used to were the sudden, violent dust storms that would appear in the same way squalls do. We often saw towering “dust devils” in the distance which were interesting to observe. The type of storm I’m talking about would appear with little notice from a clear, hard blue sky. Think of one of the large tents like you see at events except instead of open sides, the sides are down and pegged into the ground. Now think of that same tent being literally snatched up a few feet off the ground, twisted and set back down, partially collapsed. The storms rarely lasted more than maybe ten minutes and weren’t always that intense. Everything was obscured though and you certainly didn’t want to be outside without protection. As far as I know, no one ever got hurt, but cleanup always took a while.

First Time With Dolphins…..

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One of the local activities available here is interacting with dolphins. There are three different places. One is Island Dolphin Care, the therapy group I have posted about before. Although that does help fund their programs, they have had to be extra cautious during this time of COVID. The more commercial group in Key Largo is the one I booked the kids with a few years ago and further south at Theater of the Sea, there is the choice of dolphins or sea lions. Traffic is so heavy in the Keys on weekends and during holiday periods, there’s no reason for them to go the extra distance for what is a similar activity.

While swimming with dolphins is a definite experience, you do have to be a confidant swimmer and so the “shallow encounter” is better for younger children and adults who aren’t overly confidant in the water. In talking with the kids when we were up in Virginia, we decided the shallow water for granddaughter is the right choice at this stage. With the condo pool closed yet again this past summer, she didn’t get actual swim time and went to the parks with like splash pads. The shallow water encounter will allow her contact with firm footing. Also in discussion with the kids, Dad will go in with granddaughter and Mom is booked as a “watcher”. Since they have a professional videographer as an option I will check to see if they want that added on. After all, at age six, this could be something granddaughter wants to watch multiple times.

What I don’t know is when they want to tell her. My inclination is to wait and I’ll have some kind of book about dolphins under the tree wrapped. I’ll run that by them and see what they think.

Your Room At The End…….

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Musing Alert. There may not be anyone new reading this post, but if there is, the book I published in 2011, Your Room at the End: Thoughts About Aging We’d Rather Avoid (https://charliehudson.net/books/your-room-at-the-end.html) was a book I genuinely thought would provide a breakthrough for me. It’s only 150 pages, yet touches on virtually every aspect of aging that Baby Boomers need to consider for their parents/other loved ones and ourselves. As I came to learn, however, it is, “the book people should read the most and want to the least.”

The quick background is when my first husband’s mother entered her 80s, she was widowed, and my husband had been their only child. She and her husband were only surviving children and there was simply no direct family other than our son who was in college. I was in Florida which is certainly a long way from Maine. As a fiercely independent woman, she actually worked part time until she was 84 and she had a plan for her “older years”. Unfortunately, her body (and then her mind) weren’t in sync with the plan. There were some good friends who helped her a great deal and I spent much of her last two years running back and forth between Florida and Maine. In the process of doing so my next door neighbor and good friend strongly urged me to write this book, citing how she thought it would be of great use to others. (Ironically and tragically, she passed away from cancer at only age 60 less than six months after the book was published.)

Anyway, the book did not sell well even though there are several people who bought multiple copies to give to friends and/or their adult children. One gentleman is convinced the time has come to “give it another go” and use his network to promote it. Most of the content is still valid, so the fact it’s been out for ten years shouldn’t be a drawback. We’ll get started with that soon and see what happens.

 

And Forty-one Years Have Passed…..

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A bit of musing alert. Today is son’s 41st birthday. I imagine they celebrated yesterday as it’s the only day of the week they get off and Mondays are rather awkward to try and celebrate unless there is an actual holiday involved.

For those of us who have been around for a while, there is such irony in the times we were young wishing for a “future time” to “hurry up”; to be old enough to fill-in-the-blank for whatever applies.And I’m certain I have previously referenced the Country and Western song, “Don’t Blink” by Kenney Chesney. It begins with someone interviewing a man who is about to turn 100 and his advice continues, “You’re six years old and you take a nap, wake up and you’re twenty-five and your high school sweetheart is now your wife.” You look at the photos of your child as a baby, toddler, etc., and four decades have gone by. There were so many moments that marked different stages and entering adulthood came with all the questions as to what that would bring. As everyone who follows the blog knows, his career choice was not something we expected nor initially fully embraced. We did manage to work through that quickly enough so not to hold on to what we thought things should be and understand what that reality was.

There is of course also the question of, “How on earth do I have a 41-year-old son?” The answer is easy in doing the simple math and yes, that too can give pause for thought. Fortunately, Hubby and I are both in good health and active although definitely aware of normal aches and less agility than in the past. I have no doubt six-year-old granddaughter wished her Dad a Happy Birthday without a thought in the world that she will be that age someday.

Pumpkin Season…..

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I have previously posted about one of the aspects of living in South Florida is the lack of traditional “seasons”. In many parts of the country, this is the time of crisp fall mornings with smoke wafting from at least some houses and brilliant colors are seen as the leaves change. Treks are often made to pumpkin patches to pick out decorations as either just pumpkins or to create jack-o-lanterns and perhaps homemade pies, bread, etc., While I appreciate the decorative characteristics, other than roasted pumpkin seeds, neither Hubby nor I care for the taste of these famous gourds. I know it’s strange and I have friends and relatives who welcome the array of pumpkin-flavored items. I will admit my former mother-in-law did make a pumpkin chiffon pie that was mild in flavor so that when combined with graham cracker crust and the meringue topping, it was enjoyable. And a neighbor from another time did a pumpkin cheesecake that was also mild enough for us.

We actually eat pumpkins seeds routinely either as a snack or in a salad. We made a couple of attempts roasting our own and fairly quickly decided it wasn’t worth the effort. Since I don’t do any of the pumpkin items I  don’t know how many people bother with true “made from scratch”. If one goes by the many cans stocked in the grocery store, I assume most people opt for that approach. And speaking of real pumpkins, I saw a post on Facebook the other day that said if you are in an area with chickens, rather than tossing out jack-o-lanterns, give them to someone with chickens. Apparently they don’t even need to be cut up, as the chickens will peck away at them. I don’t know if it’s true, however, it does sound reasonable.

A Special Diamond….

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I’m not sure what prompted this thought; probably a TV ad about a jeweler. While I don’t necessarily agree with the “Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend” sentiment, I do like  them and for those who have ever lived there, diamonds with one’s jeans are common accessories in Texas.

Anyway, in looking at my quarter-carat ring, I recalled a couple of friends that also involve “special stories”. In one case, a friend was coming up on their twentieth wedding anniversary. She was hoping her husband would ask what she wanted which was to up-size her original ring to a full carat. As it turns out he surprised her instead with a very thoughtful different piece of jewelry which she did appreciate. That’s been quite a few years so I don’t know if she ever got the larger diamond. In the next case, the husband frequently bought jewelry as a present and therefore he had a good relationship with the jeweler. I don’t recall what the actual occasion was, but when he came home with a two-carat ring to replace hers, she was stunned. Although he did say he got it for a good price, it was definitely unexpected and she said it took her a few months to actually become accustomed to wearing it.

Now, the reason I have a quarter carat – and don’t want anything larger – is because I am tough on jewelry. I did have a larger one from my first husband and didn’t want to do the same thing again. The story with that diamond is it was his paternal grandmother’s and he had it re-set for me. It was lovely in white gold with two very small diamonds on either side of it. I continued to wear my rings for about a year after he was killed, then placed the rings into my safe deposit box in Louisiana. Three years ago when I went for my annual visit, I retrieved the ring and took it to my jeweler here. We picked out a white gold chain and he made it into a pendant. I wore it to son’s ballet performance the year they had to use an alternative theater because the one at the Kennedy Center was being renovated. I  explained to him what I’d done and said at some future point in granddaughter’s life, I would give it to her to continue the family heirloom. I have no idea yet what the occasion will be, but it will be something as special as the diamond is.

New Grill On The Way….

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Hubby’s birthday gift was easy this year. The grill needed a replacement part not long ago. When the wrong part was accidentally ordered and received, it then became a question of was it better to just replace it? I pointed out birthday was coming up, so voila!, question answered. The next question was whether to stick with the same brand or change. Let me say I’ve never owned a grill nor cooked more than I think one thing on a friend’s grill. I may have posted before that I know a few women who have mastered this type of cooking and I have very occasionally, and briefly, considered it.

Hubby, like many, started with a hibachi when he was on his own and then moved up as he had the space. I don’t know when he swapped from charcoal to gas. We have friends who prefer the old-fashioned method or who simply don’t like to mess with propane, but Hubby enjoys the ability to come up to temperature faster and the control of gas. He almost always buys a grill with the side burner too, even though he doesn’t use that often. He has had multiple brands over the years, to include a Weber, and he’s decided to go again with the Charbroil (or whichever main brand Lowe’s carries). The fact is he grills at least twice a week, often three and sometimes more, so the “life” of the grill for him is measured more in service than time.We do also have a smoker which I think could use replacing, but he rarely takes the time for smoking so that may not happen. As I have posted before, the turkey fryer gets used a few times a year and that is quite the process.

Anyway, new grill is scheduled to be delivered tomorrow, the day before his birthday. We haven’t had fish yet this week and the plan is to inaugurate it with a tuna filet for him and swordfish for me. (This is one of those situations where we happen to have one of each left from a three-pack)

Farewell to Cicely…..

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I’ve written a  few posts based on watching the entire television series, “Northern Exposure” about the quirky characters and goings-on in the fictional Cicely, Alaska. It’s always interesting to see how they choose to close out a series and after six seasons, there were some definite “loose ends” to resolve. This one was done well with an montage of scenes at the end shown as an intriguing song played. I didn’t catch the title, but it contained the lyrics of “sun setting on our town”.

The problems plaguing four of the couples were happily resolved and two of the characters continued in their lives without partners although that was more in keeping with the way they had been portrayed throughout the series. Two of the four couples were older; one in their respective 70s. A recurring theme in the series had been to candidly address older characters with their perspectives often providing insight to younger characters. It was rarely couched as advise; rather as observations which frequently included consequences of decisions made years prior. One of the aspects of the writing  I enjoyed was those exchanges reflected a mix of good, regrettable, and surprising outcomes as the characters explained why they’d made the decisions they did.

And speaking of outcomes and endings, it did bring to mind my agreement to change the ending of my first novel, Orchids in the Snow. I originally had the “mega-happy” wrap-up and the editor acknowledged that was acceptable, yet suggested I reconsider based on the character of the strong female who was almost a co-protagonist. I debated the issue for a while and then realized poignancy was probably a more reasonable approach. When I discussed this later with different readers, opinions were pretty evenly divided as to which ending was preferred.

It Could Be Worse…..

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Having unexplained car troubles is annoying, especially if it involves needing a tow. On the other hand, when I went out Monday afternoon to head to Publix and the vehicle wouldn’t start, I naturally assumed it was the battery since it hadn’t been driven for almost a week. Technically that should have been correct as it is a 2020 and doesn’t have enough miles for the battery to be down. Weird things can happen and so it was. Hubby was working all day, but neighbor was in and the first jump got me cranked. Except, in an utterly puzzling twist, that didn’t “hold”. Okay, we all know you sometimes have to let it run a few minutes. Except as I sat inside, I realized none of the instruments were on – not a single one nor was anything functioning even though the engine was running. By this time the other neighbor pulled up and we all puzzled at the oddity. Sigh! As Hubby was scheduled to work all the way through Thursday, now I’m into the will-need-a-rental car plus get vehicle towed. In light of the oddness of the situation, I decided to arrange everything for yesterday morning. Got all set into motion. When Hubby came home and I described things, he of course had to see for himself. (I can’t blame each person who knows anything about vehicles from thinking I am overlooking something.) The tow truck driver did the same thing initially yesterday as it cranked when he put the battery charger on it.

As annoying as this is, it would have been far worse had I made it to the grocery store and been parked between other vehicles with my perishables. Although the tow guy was available for an early morning tow, that is often not the case in the afternoon when the average time is 60-90 minutes. Hope to have the problem identified today and that part or parts are on-hand.

Another “Duffel Bag Drag” Trip….

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Well, my trip to Louisiana is not necessarily more complicated than at other times; merely a case of sequencing that literally won’t have me staying in any spot for more than one night. The situation for anyone who might be new to the blog is I go back to Louisiana each year (barring something like COVID) for Daddy’s birthday. We didn’t really expect him to make it to age 97, yet one never knows. I haven’t been able to get him on the phone the last couple of tries so I called the Director of the ALF he’s in. She said he’s basically in the same condition as when I was there in 2019 and does still come out to play dominoes. I was checking on the COVID rules as well – vaccination and masks as it turns out.

The difference for this trip is my sister and brother-in-law are coming over from Houston and my brother and sister-in-law up from Mandeville. (Sister-in-law will depend on how her knee is doing). In order to do my “loop” though that allows me to see some of my high school friends and the branch of my mother’s family that lives mile30 s from there, I have to juggle a bit. So, I arrive in Minden late Sep 29th. Check out of the hotel the next morning, go visit with Daddy for a few hours and drive to Natchitoches; about 1.5 hours. I have dinner with friends, check out of the hotel the next morning. Lunch with the other friends, then over to Many. Spend night with Aunt and whatever number of cousins are around. Leave Saturday morning to go back to Minden. The usual way for Daddy’s birthday is cake, cookies, and ice cream in the mid-afternoon in the dining room. We siblings will have dinner somewhere that night. I assume the others will depart for home on Sunday and I will go back by and see Daddy for a while, then drive over to Shreveport where I will spend the night and hopefully have dinner with third high school friend. I’m on the really early flight back as is my habit. Oh, duffel bag drag is a military term that means exactly that; hauling your duffel bag around without settling in one place for any length of time.