My cousin’s youngest daughter is among those who have had to cancel their wedding. It would have been a lovely outdoor event on a beach in Alabama the first week of May. The issue with trying to reschedule was my cousin wisely said they would not go for a date that was also during hurricane season which meant pushing into the fall. Rather than try and manage all that, the couple decided to forego a wedding for a civil service and as soon as they are able to travel, they will go on the honeymoon.
That brings to mind a friend who was discussing his daughter’s upcoming second wedding. He was quite clear about the fact he never thought her first husband was the right man for her, but did dutifully write the large checks for the “perfect wedding”. I suspect he did not refrain from at least one, “I told you so” though when the divorce was finalized. The second husband-to-be did meet with approval, but the event, while still quite nice, was not going to be anything like the first one. His comment to me was, “The last time we paid for a wedding; this time we’re paying for a marriage.”
I have posted previously that people may spend their money in whatever way they choose. Weddings, like cars, certainly have a range from economical to astronomical. If one has always wanted to own a Ferrari and either has the resources to do so or chooses to sacrifice buying other things in order to have the Ferrari, that’s fine. I, on the other hand, don’t even have that on my “if we win the lottery list”. That simply isn’t where I would want to put $200,000 (or in that ballpark). So, for my second cousin who won’t have the pageantry, it will still be a marriage.
Hallo Charlie,
I think your cousin’s daughter has been very sensible. I have been amazed by the number of articles I have seen were couple are bemoaning that they ‘can’t get married’ when actually what they mean is they can’t have the ceremony/wedding/party that they had in mind. One can’t help feeling that that is rather missing the point: surely the marriage, the commitment to another person is what counts, not the trimmings. A party can always follow at a later date, if desired, but if you have found someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, why would you wait.? My own wedding was very small, as we had just completed grad school and had no money, but we never dreamt of waiting until we could afford something fancy: we just wanted to be married and start the rest of our lives together. We have never regretted that decision for a moment. If this crisis teaches us anything it is that we don’t know what even the near future may hold. Better to seize the day. I wish them every happiness.
Take care, kind regards, Fiona.
Thank you. I hope this finds you well in these times. I don’t know if you saw the post where I wrapped up the Small Town Series with Small Town Quilting Treasures. Warm regards. Charlie