Thoughtful content alert. Volunteering to do good is a wonderful thing – something that I do and have often encouraged others to engage in, especially Baby Boomers who may finally be at the stage where there is time to spend in volunteer activities. In truth, there are almost always more volunteer opportunities than volunteers and choosing where to put one’s time can be tricky. So, you pick something that you feel strongly about, whether it’s cultural in nature, philanthropic, community support, or whatever. And then, well, then you can occasionally run headlong into an unexpected situation that may cause you to re-think the whole thing. The reality is that people volunteer for lots of reasons, and in some cases, those reasons are firmly attached to personal agendas that may little, if anything, to do with the good of whatever organization/group/effort you’re volunteering with. It’s human nature and that, folks, ain’t likely to change.

It may be mild enough that you can shrug it off as an irritant, a roll-your-eyes sort of response that a glass of wine (or whatever) can sooth over. At other times though, the involved party or parties may dig into a position that begins to cause you genuine stress. There are a variety of things to try if faced with this – perhaps it is all a difference of perspectives that can be resolved with a heart-to-heart conversation. Perhaps there is some background that you are unaware of that can shed light on the subject to the degree that it can revert to being an irritant rather than a stressor. If not, then it could be time to walk away. Any relationship can become dysfunctional to the point of no longer being worth the emotional investment and that includes volunteering. There are always canned excuses one can use to depart – yes, I’m talking maybe taking a dip into the “white lie” barrel, but in these cases, candor isn’t likely to be productive. If you need to walk away, don’t do it abruptly if you can avoid it, though. Give some notice, and then take a few weeks off from volunteering as you decide on another worthy project. There are plenty and you’ll find a good fit.